Tuesday, May 18, 2021

Threefold Cord

It's easy to want the fairytale wedding, the dream come true, the perfect life. I used to have a whole list of boxes I wanted checked... where we'd live, how we'd live, what occupations we'd have, what he'd say to make me feel safe and loved, what sacrifices we would be willing to make and which would be too scary. I wanted a marriage built on what we could accomplish together. I built a picture-perfect life in my mind, unstained by reality.

But when I put myself aside and look at what truly matters, it isn't boxes to be checked. It's hearts in check with the gospel. To follow the Lord is not a straight line from here to there, and then you're done. It's to be open to everything He calls you to, even if it may break your heart, knowing that the Lord can heal, for the rest of your life. I want now instead, a marriage built on what we can accomplish through the Lord. It's a life more beautiful than the picture-perfect, for in it, it's beauty shines even in the dark, for it comes from God, built out of a passion for the beauty of Christ and His church.

A passion for Christ, His gospel, His truth, and obedience to Him. When those things are genuine, all else falls into line - and when it doesn't for a time, for we are still in our broken flesh, there is repentance and redemption beyond that measure. A marriage where even when we fight each other in a moment of weakness, we fight foremost for our covenant to model Christ and his church.

A marriage where we can discuss the most painful moments of our past, our most chaining sin bends, and our driest spiritual deserts... knowing that God will use our vulnerable union to spur each other to good works, rather than deeper despair and sin.

A marriage where loyalty runs so deep, knowing it is a reflection of God's character as Christians, that we do not doubt the fidelity of the other. A man who leads and provides, yet is gentle with the hearts around him; a woman who counsels and nurtures, yet is strong for the hearts around her. A marriage worth waiting for.

A marriage that helps build the kingdom of God through a threefold cord - Christ, husband, wife. A marriage, not to fulfill our own wants, but to compliment each other's gifts in service to the Lord. To build a scripture filled, gentle, disciplined, loving, strengthening haven, living a life full of gospel centered hospitality, open to any the Lord has placed in our path.

Fiercely guarding every child that the Lord may send us.

Through our union.

Through adoption.

Through offering refuge to those who may need us only for a time.

Fiercely fighting for every person that the Lord may place in our lives.

The fellow gospel soldiers, iron sharpening iron.

The new believers, faltering on the narrow path.

The broken sinner, in desperate need for truth.

A marriage not of two people to complete each other, for in Christ we are complete. But a marriage to complete our work for the Lord, if He deems us two better as one.

Marriage 'til death do us part... at which point our lives no more end then they did begin on our wedding day. Marriage as simply part of our lives for Christ. Full of it's unique sorrows and unique joys. Knowing all the while that marriage is only a picture, a taste, of the sweet intimacy of being known by Christ, and if we were never to be part of that earthly picture, we would still be wholly and completely who God made us to be. As content with His plan if it did not include marriage as we would be if it did - when and how He chooses.

Marriage, not because a relationship is an idol in our hearts, but because if and when it becomes obvious that it is the next step of obedience in following the Lord, we are willing to put aside our own desires and fears, and step out together in trust that the Lord of the universe has kept us within His sovereignty thus far individually, and His character demands that He do no less while we walk together.