Life had been busy all during the last half of August and the first three days of September. We were so sure that every thing was going to settle down at that point, and we were planning a pizza party that Sunday as a fun "end of this craziness/relax time" treat. Instead, Daddy took Mama to the ER, because at 15 & 1/2 weeks, things didn't look good for baby. We were hopeful that it was just a scare, but after waiting in the ER waiting room for 4 and a half hours, the doctors confirmed that this sweet little baby, so joyfully expected and loved so much already, had already been called to the throne of God.
I turned twenty the next week, and on a birthday outing to get my free coffee from Starbucks with Mama the day after, we ended up having to call Daddy, who came and took Mama to the ER again. She required emergency surgery, and since then we've just been taking it one day at a time. It's been hard, sad, and long. But God is with us, and I am thankful that when I can't see where things are going, when I'm worried or the tears just can't be held back any longer, he is near to the brokenhearted, and I can trust Him when I cannot see; and that He gives that ability to those who draw near to him... because on my own, I couldn't have that faith.
We finished up the month celebrating Andrew's birthday, though, and there have been some little moment through our month that I've saved, both to share with y'all and to have to look back on in later years when we're all grown...
Laughing at:
Peter: "You are cute."
"You're cuter."
Peter: *i-know-better-than-you look*
"Um, no. I don't think you know how much I like- the CROSS." *flips my earrings*
*Josiah climbs onto Mama's lap*
*Noah turns around*
*Very professionally horrified gasp that anyone could consider that a place for anyone but him to sit*
*Christian mother goose rhymns being read*
"I think God likes every kind of song!"
Me: " yes, God loves bar songs..."
Mama: "Welll.... That's where Martin Luther's songs started..."
I'm beat.
Josiah: "Can I have your heart?"
You have it buddy... Both the pillow and the love.
Noah reached official toddler boyhood, offering me his first bouquet... Of sticks. Ah, untaught traditions. Haha! Love these little guys!
Abbi: "Noooooo, why are you making grilled cheese sandwiches with our bread?! I want a yummy sandwich!"
Abbi, bites into her sandwich: "Oh, this is better than I thought it would be. Thank you for not listening to me, Bri."
It's not like you've never had one before, child...
Josiah, just a few days after Noie brought me sticks: *brings Mama a bundle of dry leaves*
Actually, as the first day of fall, it worked ;).
Me: nothing is different from the day before, but knowing it is the first day of fall makes everything FEEL different. I love fall.
Sister number 1: "AHHHH! I accidentally licked my book!!!!"
A few of us: "HOW?!?!?"
Sister number 2: "She was sitting there doing this, and then her book went... AHHHH! I didn't mean to really lick MY book!!!!!"
Wrong way, bud.
Reading:
-"Spy for the Night Riders". I thought it was a biography on Martin Luther, but I guess it was historical fiction. Eh, oh well.
-"Attack in the Rye Grass", from the same set, and about the Whitman mission. They are good, just not the real biographies I thought they were, which could be a point in their favor for some people I guess, haha.
I did practically no reading this month. I read my bible and Valley of Vision of course... but yeah, not too much. I did read a KBR magazine too... I have so many new books I want to read... and it's fall, which means I'm obviously going to read "An Old Fashioned Girl". It's in no way a fall book, but somehow it's the perfect book to read while eating gingersnaps and drinking coffee.
Quotes I liked:
"No one is useless in this world who lightens the burdens of others." -Charles Dickons
"I start the day, the war begins
Endless reminding of my sin
And time and time again
Your truth is drowned out by the storm I'm in
Today I feel like I'm just one mistake away
From You leaving me this way
Jesus, can You show me just how far the East is from the West?
...From one scarred hand to the other."
-Casting Crowns "How far the East is from the West"
"Oh God of my delight,
...Impress on my mind the shortness of time,
the work to be engaged in,
the account to be rendered,
the nearness of eternity,
the fearful sin of despising thy Spirit."
-The Valley of Vision
"O God of Grace,
I bewail my cold, listless, heartless prayers;
their poverty adds sin to sin.
If my hope were in them I should be undone,
But the worth of Jesus perfumes my feeble breathings,
and wins their acceptance.
Deepen my contrition of heart,
Confirm my faith in the blood that washes from all sin. May I walk lovingly with my great Redeemer.
Flood my soul with true repentance
that my heart may be broken for sin and unto sin.
Let me be as slow to forgive myself as thou art ready to forgive me.
Gazing on the glories of thy grace
may I be cast into the lowest depths of shame,
and walk with downcast head
now thou art pacified towards me.
O my great High Priest,
pour down upon me streams of needful grace,
bless me in all my undertakings,
in every thought of my mind,
every word of my lips,
every step of my feet,,
every deed of my hands.
Thou didst live to bless,
die to bless,
rise to bless,
ascend to bless,
take thy throne to bless,
and now thou dost reign to bless.
O give sincerity to my desires,
earnestness to my supplications,
fervour to my love"
-The Valley of Vision
The Shop:
-Fall items went up! And I created two of my new favorite canvases for that section. I love poetical quotes <3.
-I hit 50 listings up at the same time for the first time! And there are more waiting to go up :D!
-And Mama and Daddy got me shipping labels for my birthday, which is something I have been thinking is a must for shipping at home, so that is exciting :)!
Fails:
-This whole month was pretty much full of fails, but they weren't all that comical, for the most part, so I don't think I'll bother sharing them. I did cause us to find out that we could survive for 3-4 days with only 2 sticks of butter in the house, which we thought was impossible, so there was that fail/experiment.
-Oh, and I kept forgetting to take the little ones out/when I would they would forget to bring out an egg they were experimenting on. They soaked it in vinegar so it would bounce. Problem was, it soaked SO long that it got SO soft that it just exploded on impact anyway. It was fluff instead of goo inside though, so obviously it works when you don't leave it too long, haha.
-My gideon cyst left for all of three days. At least I know it's not permanent, but seriously?
Grateful for:
-The promise of eternal union with God and the saints around his throne to those who believe.
-For the time we had planning for and loving our precious little Cupcake, tiny Selah, no matter the ache it left when it was over. It's amazing and beautiful how quickly someone you have never met can change your life; what a print they can leave on your heart, without ever leaving a fingerprint on the world; what an impact a person can have in only 15 weeks, simple because the Lord willed it so.
-That the Lord's hand was over the situation when Mama needed surgery. There are several ways the whole thing could have been made worse than it was... definitely not least, that without the medicine and knowledge had today, we could have lost the most selfless, caring person God has blessed the earth with.
-My grandparent's care for us all during that trying day. The prayers, the food they brought, the shopping they did for us, the texts and listening ear they gave me, just the very fact that they wanted to be there just to make sure that we were all taken care of and loved <3. It was such a blessing.
-The church families (and Daddy's work) who blessed us with meals the past few weeks. It was a sweet gesture, and they were all so generous... we typically got two meals out of every meal brought to us!
-My new coffee mug from a friend, in the cutest little package, and she send me the SWEETEST card, with all these scripture references, and it was just the thing I needed the day I got it, because it was just one of those days, right after Mama's surgery, and yes <3. Godly friends are one of God's sweetest blessings <3!!! She also sent me bible journaling pens, and I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW SHE KNEW I DID THAT, but it was wonderful. And it reminded me I've meant to share my journaling bible with you a little through this blog :D. Maybe...
-Pumpkin muffins, gingersnaps, and coffee... fall essentials!
-"The King's Blooming Rose" magazines. We just renewed our subscription, so we've gotten two in three weeks, haha. It's been a blessing right now!
In other random news, Andrew and Bethi found a turtle, which Noah ABSOLUTELY loved, and it was so cute! (But do NOT ask Noah to get within two feet of it though; he loved it from a distance ;).)
Also, we tried these fruit things, and they were weird... juicy, fibery grapes with not crispness?
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"May the Lord, the God of your fathers... bless you!" Deuteronomy 1:11